A lot of changes going on. One of the biggest things for me is the 3rd anniversary of my mother’s death which is tomorrow and the anniversary of my former partner’s ex-wife and his 8-year-old daughter’s mother’s death from cancer one year ago today. That whole year was a trying time and the culmination of her death and how she did it with complete grace, strength and dignity was extremely beautiful in its own way. She taught us well during those last moments.
The time is here, and it seems to be the time of year, for feeling the feelings related to death, especially with the impact of the deaths that have occurred in my world in the last couple of weeks, too. Death and rebirth seem to be the theme of this month for me now.
This is a timeless conversation.
Is this time of year like that for you too?
Thinking about how life keeps shifting and moving around me as I sit in it and feel the emotions coming up. Emotions of sadness, grief, fear, and excitement.
Life is really shifting for me and being with the people I love dearly is both helping these shifts and bringing up sadness. Life as I knew it is becoming different. Something I have always wanted. To travel, see friends I haven’t seen in a long time, new places and places I have yet to see.
I am prepping for The Ride of My Life on the road, beginning in January. I haven’t set a date yet because I still have some things I’m working on and completing.
Once again, coming up this week, I will be talking to someone to get some ideas on how I will be setting my car up for this and will begin the setup. I will keep you posted through video at some point as it goes. I’m really looking forward to that.
The biggest thing… the emotions. My little girl, my inner child is going through a mish mash of them. She is so excited and at the same time is feeling the grief.
I did an interview for The Ride of My Life Podcast with my former partner Noel Neu. He is working on the gifts he provides people to move forward in their lives. He has been a huge part of my healing journey. As a therapist, as a musician, as a songwriter, through our partnership, my entire life changed. It was the biggest growth journey I had ever gone through. Until today…
We met in the moment and that moment was so incredibly powerful. He did a process with me that he calls Inner Child Integration Meditation. What it does is it connects you with your inner child who is stuck in some kind of fear, not any particular fear, helps to ground your inner child, and helps the child integrate with you into your higher self.
And it worked! I connected deeply with my little girl and integrated with my adult self. It was so incredibly powerful; I could feel the energy running from the top of my head to my root chakra.
It was difficult for me as it started based on the wording that was used as I connected in the first part, my little girl melted into it, was tearing up, hearing words, and feeling it through the breath. This was something she needed to hear from me our whole life. When we proceeded to work with my adult self, I felt so much stronger walking through it. Again, the words and breath led me to a whole new place.
When we got to the point of integration, I felt more grounded, confident, and connected with my higher self or my adult empowered self. I felt myself feeling scared and not trusting at the beginning to a point of release and freedom through this meditation. It was so powerful and that was when I felt the vibrations running through my body.
Our partnership was about music and growth which led to both of shifting into our own paths. For me, it was the first time that a partnership morphed into a different kind of relationship, one that I have never experienced before in my life. Words cannot appropriately describe what this means, however, the feeling of peace and connection, do.
Doing the interview with him became yet another step on the healing journey we have been through together. We have known each other deeply and to be able to cross a healing bridge in this way, during this interview, opened things up for me that I never expected.
As I sit here writing this, I find myself in a completely different space, one of love, peace, and joy, just preparing to meet my life in a whole different way. I don’t know what that looks like in this moment. The big news is moving from the fear of the unknown to possibilities.
I welcome them and look forward to what this brings on The Ride of My Life!